Great Expectations Chapter XXXI

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Chapter XXXI

Alex came home to find Vivian on their couch watching the television and sobbing. A commercial was on, and Vivian had the sound turned down. “What is it, honey?”

“Oh, Alex, it’s so awful. My friend Denise just called. Her kid was stationed in Baghdad, and…” Vivian cradled her head in her hands. “God, I can’t believe it. None of this stuff seems real.”

“It’s okay.” He leaned her head against his shoulder. “It’s okay. Now take a couple of deep breaths. You’ll be fine.”

“Of course I’ll be fine, but Harry won’t.” Vivian couldn’t keep still. She pulled away from him, then stood up and paced. “Oh my gosh! A car exploded, and he… God… he made it to the hospital, and then…they thought he was going to make it. And then he just…he just died.” Her breath came in gasps, and for awhile she couldn’t do anything but cry. “See, he’d lost a lot of blood, and they thought they’d stopped all the bleeding, but then something opened back up and ... Oh, God, I don’t know. I don’t know how it could have happened.” She wiped at the tears with the back of her hand. “It seems like a bad dream …and I keep expecting to wake up and have it all go away, and… instead it just goes on and on.”

Vivian turned back towards Alex and sobbed into his shoulder and, for a long while, she couldn’t stop. “Denise said he was badly cut up. I wonder what it was like. You know… How much pain… The medics said his chest had shrapnel - so much that he couldn’t take a breath without tearing flesh.”

“Calm down, Honey. It’s all okay. You’ll be okay. I’m here now.”

“Oh, Alex of course I’ll be fine. But what about Denise? She lost a son, and his death was brutal. What about Harry’s wife, Chris? She idolized Harry. And what about their kids? Todd’s just a baby, too young to remember any of this, but Ashley’s five and Harry had promised her that he’d be back. What on earth is Chris going to tell her? They’re the ones who aren’t going to be fine.”

Vivian pulled herself back from Alex’s arms and looked into his eyes. “The funeral will be held next weekend in Bar Harbor. We can stay at my parents’ house.”

She said it with certainty in her voice. Always the supportive wife, Vivian had never made plans for Alex before, especially plans that she knew Alex wasn’t going to like.

“We can?” he asked. A weekend at Vivian’s folks’ house and a funeral sounded uncomfortably dull.

“Oh, Alex, we have to go to the funeral. She was my best friend in high school. We only stayed in touch by Christmas cards and a few e-mails, but I’ve got to go. Alex, you’ll come with me won’t you? I’m so much stronger when you’re beside me.” Vivian sat back down next to him.

“Of course, Honey. We’ll do whatever you want. Don’t worry. It’ll all be fine.”

And holding her closely, he kissed her forehead as a father would a young child, and she clung to the soothing warmth of his chest against her, drawing strength and comfort from him.

But as Alex comforted Vivian, a funny, prickling, uneasy sensation nagged at the back of his mind. A warning maybe? He pushed Vivian away on the pretext of turning off the television. Why did he suddenly feel so jumpy? He tried to use logic, but nothing fit, and, as the warning sensation wasn’t all that strong or uncomfortable, Alex shrugged and dismissed it.



The plane landed in Bar Harbor Airport, and Alex and Vivian picked up a rented Ferrari for their trip into Bar Harbor. He hadn’t allowed any spare time for visiting. They’d attend the funeral and pay their respects; then Vivian would drive Alex back to the airport, and she’d stay on at Bar Harbor for a week and spend time with her family.

As they drove along the highway, songs from the seventies chimed through the speakers. Alex looked at Vivian and a sudden tenderness settled around him like a knitted blanket, and he wished that they could start over without the lying and infidelity. In some ways they’d shared so much. But then there was that stone wall protecting those things that Alex could never share – the secrets that could destroy everything.

The prickling, uncomfortable sensation came back much stronger now, and he knew for certain that it had been a mistake to come to Bar Harbor.